Monday 31 December 2012

New Toy






Shining and bouncing

New toy in shivering hands

Smile says it all


This Haiku is shared with Haiku Heights and the Prompt is New.

Forbidden Memories ...





“Mommy mommy” her five and a half year old daughter Sanya is calling  but she is not even looking at her. Priya is not here , lost somewhere deep, deep in her thoughts , thoughts about her past , thoughts about her dreams, Thoughts about her true love which was so pure, so inseparable but now a memory only.

Little Sanya this time pulls her dupatta and at the same time pulls her out of her trails of thoughts. “Mommy Mommy , look here na " . Being in a fit of her memories Priya tries hard to smile "Yes my darling baby, tell me what you want to show mommy "  “Mommy look look , you have got two grey hair on this side” Sanya points out her cute little fingers towards her hair “Mommy r u gettng old”. Another blow of despair hits Priya this time really hard, “M I growing old , but I have not even lived my life properly, the way I wanted always . My dreams were destined to be fulfilled but now” and she again loses herself to her memories.

Priya is a thirty two year old, very well educated lady married to vikram who is posted as a highly paid and respectable manager in a Europe based company and Sanya is their only kid, the only reason for them being still together . A nine year old relation has hit the rocks hard , breathing its last few breaths. Few months more and everything will turn to ashes. Priya has tried everything to save her marriage for the sake of her daughter Sanya but Vikram is as admant as he was nine years back. Nothing seems reversible now.It has to end one day, sooner or later. The day Sanaya leaves for her Bording school in Nainital , Vikram will leave Priya too. She will be left alone with her past and some Forbidden memories.

The Ending




His cold footsteps and bleak efforts said it all. I somehow knew what is it in his mind, what he wants to tell me, the same old thing which I have been hearing for all these years, month after month. This time I was through, I wanted to stop this torture, to him and to myself.

“Samaira, uummm…well aahhh….hope I am not disturbing you, I am here to ask for something …” his words went piercing my heart and my body was numb again, though this has happened several times but every time I or infact my body reacted the same way, begging him to think again and  making him change his mind, but this time I won’t give any effort, I am shattered and tired of crying.

“Sunny you don’t need to say anything, maybe I know and I am finally giving you what you are actually trying to ask for…” I sighed and finally blurted out the words he wanted to listen “I am letting you go” and then I cried insanely in his broad yet cold embrace but for the last time.



This five sentence fiction has been shared on Five Sentence Fiction – Ending

Saturday 29 December 2012

~ from HER ~

~ from HER ~


And, hence, the endless pain ceases,
My wounded bleeding soul now rest in peace,
In a much safer hands and blessed place,
As I sleep in my eternal father’s lap ..
My father shed tears as he saw me struggling,
My mother who cried her tender heart out,
Friends and siblings, who fought on my behalf,
Left with melancholy and burning agony to bear ..
My chapter hence closes, but the book is yet to read,
If the humanity is alive, keep the rest of my kind safe ..
So cynical are my kind, as I breathe my last breath,
Was I only chopped and not their faith been raped?
Make the fiends realize that I too once lived,
I breathed, I felt, I got minced, and then, I died …
To err is the humans trait, and being a girl was my fate ..
Was I wrong in trusting my fellow human?
Being always taught to trust their strength ..
As a brother, a friend, a father and a human ..
They used their strength to tear my body apart,
Sullied my honor, Fed on my flesh, and skinned me alive ..
For the faults, which I'd never ever realize ..
Dismayed I am, and my belief turns vile,
Facets of my misery grew into bleeding wounds,
As few of those ghouls mocked my feeble soul ..
I left for a haven secured from hungry eyes,
Please, keep them safe, who are still alive … Who are still alive ...

Wednesday 26 December 2012

A ride of Pleasure




Watery ecstasy raining from your dreamy eyes,

Drenching me as I get hold of you my love, benign

Perfectly filing your delicate curves, intricate angles,

As your velvety pearled skin glides under mine

Burning desires and melting passion,

I crush all under my manly thrust

Heaven is where I dwell at the moment,

Under my sweaty self, our love blossom

Your parting lips, yearning for more,

Savouring you is my only living wish

Reaching your tongue, a tryst hence accedes,

Twisting and twirling, we play a little while

Drinking your liquid love and glossy warmth,

I caress your honey dripped moist skin

Warped am I cupping all our candid emotions,

Mellifluous still remains the love we share

Devouring all the flavours from lips to neck,

Bosom is the search my lips fondly indulge

Melodious sound of your heavy breathe,

Rhythm filled moment makes me crave for more

Small hungry kisses and passionate love bites,

Colouring your cheeks red as you lovingly coy

Urge is melting and so are we with the moment,

Making out with you, my love, maneuver sublime

Curling up all the gaps and spaces between us,

I take you on a ride of delirious pleasure…

Snow


 
 
Cotton magic balls

Freezed heavenly love showers

Warmly melting snow
 
 
 
This Haiku is shared with Haiku Heights and the Prompt is Snow.

 

Friday 21 December 2012

Vision




Feeling dizzy and my thoughts still lingering to the beautiful yet naughty giggling sound that I heard few hours back.

The sound is so crisp and clear in my stupid little head as if I was there with them, laughing full heartedly, rejoicing the moment, the moment which I am unaware of.

Misty and smoggy was the sight, but I could easily figure out their movements, as they were gracefully twisting and turning their beautifully carved bodies.

Sublime and heavenly were their moves, dancing to the tunes which  neither I have heard before, nor was I able to understand but it was soothing and melodious, no doubt.

All of a sudden while I was lost and my thoughts unconsciously dancing with their feet in rhythm, the spell broke, sight got marred and the dancing angels vanished, leaving me there alone, mesmerized and startled to the magic I witnessed.


This five sentence fiction has been shared on Five Sentence Fiction – Vision
 

Wednesday 19 December 2012

Walking through the Worlds


~ Walking through the Worlds ~

Traces of lost life, so tantalize my mind
Walking through the Worlds, now I realize …
The moments, I have been yearning,
Chasing, following, and adoring
They lie here dead, with my soulless self
Memories left beseeching … and forlorn
As I savoured that were never worth …
Scuffling with the fate and the approaching time
Longing to go back, to the one who once loved
Before I doom, die and perish, unravel my life
Just make me stay … just once … for a while …
Let me acknowledge my snivelling part
As my stained soul lingers to my cold body
Wishing to garner those very, very last breaths …
With nobody around to shed a single tear, or even blame
Hence, wishes and desires are now, just a mug’s game
Penance, grievance, repentance, not mere words
The only indulgence of my weary, bleeding soul …
Masquerading myself to match the world out here
Stepped on to the dreams that freely once swayed …
Weeds I grew, till the air was warm and fresh
Breaths are stale, and weeds are already so dead …
Traces of lost life, so tantalize my mind
Walking through the Worlds, now I realize!

Tuesday 18 December 2012

Wish

 
               

     Wish candy smile
Dimpled laughter of child
     Angel sing lullaby..



                   



This Haiku is shared with Haiku Heights and the Prompt is Wishes.

Saturday 15 December 2012

Trial Time..


Hues of orange dripping into the shades of sorrow spread across the horizon, as it woes.

His beloved mother awaits for the sacrifice he once promised, time to pay back and he will be doing it gallantly.

No fear, no worries and no emotions can hold him back now.

His passion and selfless love will be retrieved and his mother will breathe the air of enduring and exuberating joy of freedom.

He lovingly kisses Shimi on her cheek as the colour of fear and loss flushes through her transparent but pale skin, very clear to her that she is losing him forever but no regrets, its her trial time too.


This five sentence fiction has been shared on Five Sentence Fiction – Devotion
 

Friday 14 December 2012

Thou art my Saviour...

So Mundane I am, the thought crossed my mind,

The image in the mirror irked me to tears…

Wrinkled face, freckled and tanned skin,

Once it glowed like ‘The morning Sun’…


Thoughts are lost, so am I into them,

Diving deep into the palpable dreams of mine…

Slumbered and inebriated with suffocating pain,

Here I stand alone again startled and agape…


I notice none, only a shadow gazing with despise,

Shadow it isn’t, a personification of my dreams...

A charmer, an allurer, with its open arms,

How I wish to chase it and loose myself free…


A knock on the door and my dream shatters,

You pull me out as I Fein to drown more…

You caress my wrinkled skin, stare into my blank eyes,

Every touch of yours makes me come alive…


Waking up from my dreams, the everlasting love I retrieve,

Your arms are the place where my desires breathe…

Shadow was nothing but a lie, a myth, a traitor,

It’s you my love and, Thou art my Saviour

 

Who was SHE ?


Deep Blue Colored velvety silhouette hugging her body, her milky complexion, her long curly soft hair tied in a loose bun with few strands swinging on her bare shoulders and falling on her face in a way as to make it look as beautiful as a moon hiding its unbeatable beauty behind those clouds. Her flawless beauty appears to be all the more mesmerizing in the ambience of the bar, dim blue light is making her appear more like an angel. She came here few minutes back with a huge man who appeared rich enough. Might be her boyfriend, though I just hope he is not.

AAHH me …She just left her seat and is coming towards me. Am I day dreaming, hope not. She stops so close to me. I am sitting too close to the orchestra guys. She whispers something in the ear of the male singer. OHHH MY GOD, she is so undeniably beautiful. I can leave my whole world for her. The sparkle in her eyes and the movement of her soft pink lips as she whispers makes me fall for her over and over again. As she is about to go back, she gives me a look and trust me my heart skipped a beat or two. The orchestra starts playing my favorite song, it means our choice of music is quite the same. Are we destined to meet, or otherwise how does it make sense for me to feel for her so strongly.

Beautiful things can happen over a cup of coffee but a lot better and unexpected things happen over a mug of beer. I am a 26 year old guy with enough good looks to make any girl go gaga over me but no girl could ever possibly make me hear a single bell jingling in my head but she is making my head sway along with those thousand jingling bells. Am I falling in love with the girl ( I don’t know her name even) that too at first sight. Do such things happen in real, well am sure now, they do.

I have already visited washroom 4-5 times just to get her closer view, she is sitting close on to the way to washroom. They have already ordered their drinks and she is sipping her drink slowly. Every act of her adds to her sensuality, which my eyes are fondly feasting upon.  As I was admiring her timeless beauty, the guy with her (I am hating him so much now..ggrrr…)gets a call on his cellphone and he goes out to hear it because of the persistent noise in the bar. This is the right moment, I should approach her. May be I am hastening the things but I don’t want to regret for not approaching her for the rest of my life. I can see her, she is calling someone but the person on the other side isn’t answering the call. She seems worried and tensed as if something bad has happened. I am now concerned and want to walk up to her and offer some help, if required.

It has been 45 minutes, she is still calling. I can clearly see tears in her eyes. I am dying to wipe them off and hug her tight to take away all her worries. Being firm and clear in my head, I leave my seat to reach hers but before I could get any closer to her seat, she makes her payment and rushes out of the bar. I too follow her but she has already left. I can’t see her anywhere. She is GONE. I stand there numb not knowing if I will ever see her again and the only question that surrounds my head instead of those jingling bells is “Who was SHE ?”

 

Trust ...a big deal...


Never trust any man other than your husband, not even your father, this was something my mom kept telling me since I was a kid. Seemed so ridiculous, "come-on mama world isn’t that bad as you think it to be" I used to utter every time after a full length speech from my mom and she would just say in return “Beta I have got more experience ".

Living in my own fantasies, a fairy world where everything seemed so beautiful and I was so careless. My Father has always been the most protective person around me and my sister. Those restrictions and their care seemed so bounding, always wanted to break myself free. I was becoming a rebel from somewhere deep inside. Yelled a lot many times,cried a lot many times.
 
Wish I could have understood them. Wish i could have known how bad this world is in real. After experiencing it myself, here I stand with a handful of experience though a bad one. I regret for everything. Regret for even BEING A GIRL.

Life doesn’t come handy, especially for a girl. Always seen as a sex object, a thing to fulfill the desire of ever so hungry man. Now m married, have a baby boy, though always wished for a girl child but m afraid now. i can’t bear the pain of watching my Baby being eyed as an eye candy by this bad world. And I know no other parent can. Can this also be another reason for increasing Female Infanticide? Not sure but it can be. It’s sad but it’s true.

I hope if I ever have a girl child , I should b able to provide her a clean n protected society where she can roam with all her free spirit and while she is enjoying her beautiful life I should be able to sit back at home , carefree, knowing that my baby is safe out there . Not sure if this will ever happen, till then I wish I don’t have a girl child.




 

Sunday 9 December 2012

My bud YOU are....

~ My bud YOU are … ~

You cling to my wall as a bud to its vine,
I fondly nurture you, while you sleep in my womb …
Yes, a bud you are to me, a bud yet to bloom,
A bud to grow into light when my life is about to gloom …
Carrying you safely, while picking up the pearls of my life,
OH, these lovely nine pearls that I will cherish till I die …
Through the scorching heat as my timid body emits fire,
And till the time when my feet are icy cold and wired
You are the only treasure mushrooming as my shadow,
My only coveted dream is to have you in my arms …
Ecstasy is enough; still I am ambling through the time,
Snuggling, cuddling and kissing you, will be my rewards …
OH, my so precious … You ……
Here … you come as a manifestation of my desires,
The only beautiful sight, I always wished to have …
OH, how I wish to take you in my longing embrace,
And, soothe your thirsty tongue with my motherly joy —
Joy that exuberates to flow through my shivering chest,
Dispensing you my love, now go, and live your life …
Yes, live your life … OH, my precious life ……
Now … I shrivel with the time, being a mortal self,
Still, enduring the faith of your presence in my world
Will you be there to shade the root you once clung — Or —

Will I be left to lynch with the melancholy of my callous fate!


A Mother....


Linked with  D'verse Poets Pub - Mining the memory

Saturday 8 December 2012

Only, if YOU ever knew...


I am not perfect, and I don’t know how to show,

You are my entire world, only, if YOU ever knew…

Dismayed and shattered, my heart bleeds,

A word to caress and a hug, is it all needs…

Kisses that melted us, touches that were so profound,

You could have read that all in my eyes,

Only, if YOU ever knew….

 

Wings I got from your love that was so benign,

I flied high in the sky of eternal bliss and frolic joy…

Innocuous and Saigne was the love we once endeared,

Insatiable it stands as I dawdle here alone,

On the path we once together strolled….

 

Life is so gloomy and my world has turned vile,

My heart is turning somber  without you…

You won’t ever know this, still I wish,

Only, if  YOU ever knew.....



A heart broken Lover







Thursday 6 December 2012

Some untold Lies...


 
His eyelids are reddish and swollen, shirt is still dampened with tears, I know he has been crying for whole night. What is he afraid of? Why is he still holding my hand while in a deep sleep? Howsoever tight he holds my hand, he can’t stop me from leaving him this time, I have to go now, for ever and ever. I am happy to see him sleeping, he seem at peace, carefree and stronger. I want him to be the same when he wakes up but will he be? Am not sure …

My illness has taken a toll on his health and emotions. He has not slept properly for all these days, don't even remember when he ate something last. All because he knows that few more hours and I will be no more than a memory for him and for my baby, who is just two years old , too small to feel the absence of his mother. He might miss the care and love which I always wanted to shower on him in his growing age, but no more. Seven long months and I have been lying to myself that this day won’t come ever and I will recover from this damn disease....cervical cancer. I have been strong all through while it got diagnosed last year and since then I have been fighting with it and in the process telling myself a several lies. Lies that hold no significance today. I am dying and that’s the biggest truth I need to accept, he need to accept. Will he ever?

Everything got ravaged that was so beautiful once, my ardent love for him, our vows to stay together till we breathe, my exuberating and exciting motherhood, and my frolic desires to cherish every moment with my baby, to watch him growing. OOHHH, I so much wanted him to look like his dad, even if he do now, I won’t be there to rejoice. Every little dream has been quashed and now here at this moment I am giving up and letting the destiny take over. I won’t affray anymore. I am tired. I wish to sleep now.

Even if I am gone, lie to him that I never did. Teach him to endure this pain, it will soon be over. I will always be there watching over him and the baby. Tranquillity will soon hit the shores of their life. They will be happy and so will I  be to see them. Lie to them that life will be as beautiful as it was before. Lie to them that no affliction can take away the strength they possess. Lie to them that I will soon return. Lie to them that I am not dying, just taking a small break from my tiresome life. Tell them to believe into all these lies. The lies I wanted to believe once, now my only gift to them.
 
A loving wife and a sad mother……